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June 02, 2004
A Conversation With Dick
yesterday seemed to be bizarre phone call with the parents day.
my phone rings at my desk -- it's my mom. she's in the middle of her hectic last minute packing for their next trip to Europe. this time they're going to Sicily. anyway, she says the neighbor will again be taking care of her place, but he's having health problems and she's worried about him. this is the same neighbor she had look after her place last September, the neighbor named Dick Johnson.
i admit it, my sense of humor was raised in the gutter and honed (heh) on Beavis & Butthead, so when she mentions that guy's name it always makes me snicker. but yesterday without realizing it, she took it further.
mom: his health isn't the best right now, i'm not sure how to handle him.
me: you're not sure how to handle Dick?
mom: well, his head's not really in this right now.
me: Dick's head isn't screwed on quite right?
mom: in a way, yeah. i just don't think he's up to the job.
oh lord, i had to fake a coughing fit at that point, just to cover the laughter. as far as moms go, mine is pretty cool. but i don't think even she would have appreciated my take on that conversation if i had explained it. so i wished her bon voyage and told her i'd check in on Dick once in a while for her while she was away.
next up yesterday was Erin's evening chat with her folks. remember i mentioned a post or two back that we just bought a new washer and dryer? our old ones she and i bought shortly after we were married, 17 years ago. they're loud and i'm sure not too energy efficient, so it was time to get those cool stackable front-loaders we'd been sort of coveting.
anyway, Erin's on the phone with her dad and she brings this up. all i can hear is her side, but this is what transpired:
Yes, we bought them brand new.
Because the old one's are older than dirt, that's why.
17 years.
Of course that's old -- how old are yours?
WHAT? You've got to be kidding! Do you realize that your dryer is older than my friend who just got married?!
i kid you not. i laughed out-loud because i could totally relate -- my dad has a dryer that's as old as i am that he refuses to replace. but what the flock is up with that?! i swear it's sort of a badge of honor -- to see how long you can make something last. i understand that when one lives on a fixed income that you want to watch your money, but come on. if it overheats and makes noise and is older than some of your kids married friends, i think it's ok to get a new one.
and for the record, after hearing about their relics, we offered them ours -- after all, our relics are half the age of theirs. he said he'd think about it, but if he took ours he wouldn't know what to do with his... gah!
Posted by P at June 2, 2004 06:18 AM
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Comments
Haha! Parents are funny about shit like that! My parents had an artificial Christmas tree for 25 years until they finally got rid of it last christmas. I think my mom cried when they threw it out!
Still having internet problems at home? I see that Erin isnt posting.
Have a good one!
Dew
Posted by: dewnut at June 2, 2004 06:42 AM
~shoot Dew, I took my 'rents old/25 or 30 years old, aluminum Xmas tree when they wanted to get rid of it...it's worth some loot, collectible actually...~
Posted by: btezra at June 2, 2004 09:51 AM
My folks had to get all new appliances because they moved and everything is electric where they moved to....now I have new appliance envy. I want one of those fancy new washers that AGITATEs your clothes in a fashion that gets them ACTUALLY clean...how novel.
Posted by: Miss Bliss at June 7, 2004 11:18 AM
My parents own a circa 1973 harvest gold dryer. It cooks clothes, moves around the garage and makes a lot of noise. Our dog used to bark at it during it's garage dance.
Will they get rid of it? No. Why? Same reasons as Erin's parents!
Posted by: Erik at June 7, 2004 12:51 PM
that's too funny!
Posted by: brian at June 8, 2004 04:42 PM
I worked with a guy that had college roommates named... Mike Swallow and Kenny Boner. I'm dead serious. We ended up hiring Swallow so I know the story was true.
Posted by: nefarious at June 10, 2004 07:04 PM